Hey Lord...

I thank you for allowing me to have had these last couple of days to examine me and my life. I know that I have made many mistakes over the years but none have compared to the mistakes I made by not following your words. I have come to the quick realization that home is where my heart is and I think at this point in the game I can't tell where home is because my heart has not found peace and the tranquil I desire. I know every part of me hates where I reside and that has everything to do with the circumstances of my inability to believe that you led me to that place for a reason. I want what every person desires to be happy and free from the burdens that I carry from my past. Not every person is out to hurt me and because I can't recognize trust I can't find that salvation I seek. I ask you God on a daily basis to continue bless me and help me find the strength that I need but is that all I need to do? I pray, give him praise and I ask for your guidance hourly. I am not that strong individual that I pretend to be I'm only human, but you know that. I am a woman first and a mother second. I admit I can't do this anymore Lord that's why I'm writing to you at this hour, I just hope that you can decipher through all of this and give me what I so desire, that inner strength and happiness. Thank you Lord for blessing me, without you I know none of this possible.

Selfish.....

I never in a million years thought I would state that you are selfish. You are a stubborn, selfish, spiteful, and a very negative individual. You have stated you live your life according to God but yet you are so judgmental and I never could understand people like you, thus my reason for not wanting to concern myself any further. God is my juror not you. What I choose to do with my time should not be a factor that you deem a fault.

I honestly believe that you are living under false pretense and yes I failed to recognize your inabilities but believe it or not despite my ways, God is very active in my life. He has presented me with so many signs and I have for the most ignored his words but I won’t and will no longer continue down that path. I need to Love, Live and enjoy my LIFE according to God. I will no longer allow anger and ignorance to hold me hostage. I FOUND MYSELF, and the sooner you look in the mirror and see past your swag than you will be able to appreciate life and what God has in store for you.

Not all women are out to do you wrong, but you will never see that so long as you only see swag. Have a great life and enjoy her……